Parenting Plans
A parenting plan is a written document that outlines how parents will raise their children after separation or divorce. A parenting plan does not have to use legal terms.
A parenting plan generally focuses on describing parenting arrangements such as:
- when and how much time each parent will spend with a child
- how decisions about the child are made (for example, jointly or individually but in consultation with the other parent)
- how information is shared between parents
- how other parenting issues may be addressed
A parenting plan is also a requirement to proceed in the Manitoba court if parents do not agree on parenting arrangements for their children, in which case each parent must complete one. For more information about Parenting Agreements and Parenting Orders, visit the Resolution Section of our website.
The Manitoba government’s For the Sake of the Children parent information program provides information to help parents develop a child–focused parenting plan. You may also choose to consult a family lawyer when you are developing a parenting plan. A family law lawyer can help you to understand your legal rights and responsibilities before you make the plan final.
For more information about parenting plans, including a checklist and interactive tool to assist you in creating a plan, please visit the Justice Canada website
What if there have been physical assaults or yelling, screaming, insults or put-downs in our house? My child’s other parent is seeking regular periods of parenting time, but it feels dangerous to me.
When there has been intimate partner or family violence in your house, either physical or emotional, this changes how you would make a parenting plan. It is not in the children’s best interests to follow a plan in which one parent, or the children themselves, do not feel safe. If this is happening, you should involve a professional counselor, social worker, or mediator with experience in high conflict divorce and intimate partner violence, or a lawyer before agreeing to any plan or change in plans. If you are too afraid to stand your ground on this, get help.
If anyone in the home is in immediate danger, call 911. If you, or someone you know, is being abused, call the confidential 24/7 provincial toll-free crisis line at: 1-877-977-0007.
If you are not sure if a behavior is harmful to a child, call Child and Family Services (CFS) at 1-866-345-9241 for more information. When children have witnessed abuse, CFS can do an assessment for child protection.
Resources to address intimate partner violence can be found on the Family Law Manitoba website. For more information or help, contact a family guide who can help with risk assessments and safety planning at GetGuidance@gov.mb.ca or 204-945-2313 in Winnipeg; toll-free 1-844-808-2313 in Manitoba.
What is ”parenting time”?
“Parenting time” means the time that a child spends in the care of a person referred to in a parenting order, whether or not the child is physically with that person during all of that period.
Changes to the Divorce Act, which came into effect March 1, 2021, and Manitoba’s new Family Law Act that came into effect July 1, 2023 no longer include the words “custody” and “access” as legal terms. Instead, courts will make parenting orders and each parent will be allocated parenting time and decision making responsibility. This change is intended to focus on relationships with children, such as parenting time and decision-making responsibility, but will not alter how day-to-day decision making around the children will occur. The Divorce Act only applies to parents who were married to each other if they are seeking a divorce in Canada. The Family Law Act applies to parents whether or not they are married.
What is “decision-making responsibility”?
"Decision-making responsibility" means responsibility for making significant decisions about a child's well-being, including in relation to the child's
- health;
- education;
- culture, language, religion and spirituality; and
- significant extra-curricular activities.
The Divorce Act and The Family Law Act also allow someone who is not a parent to apply for a parenting order if they can show that they stand in the place of a parent of a child but only with the court’s permission.
What are “parental responsibilities” under The Family Law Act?
"Parental responsibilities" means the responsibilities associated with the care of a child, including responsibilities associated with parenting time and decision-making responsibility, but not including the responsibility to pay child support. Child support is, of course, a responsibility of parents, but it is dealt with separately than parenting time and decision-making responsibility.
Under The Family Law Act, if a parenting order has not been made, both parents of a child have joint rights to exercise parental responsibilities with respect to their children, unless the parents have never lived together after a child is born, in which case the parent with whom the child lives is the only parent with parental responsibilities respecting the child. A written agreement cannot change the rights of the parent or parents to exercise parental responsibilities and it does not matter if they are married or unmarried.
What is a “contact order”?
Family members and non-family members may apply under The Family Law Act for a contact order to permit them to have contact with a child when the child’s parents is not permitting this. The purpose of a contact order is:
- to facilitate relationships between children and their grandparents and other family members, when those relationships are in the child's best interests; and
- to recognize that in exceptional circumstances children can benefit from contact with non-family members under a contact order, when such contact is in the child's best interests.
Contact with a child may include spending time together, or other kinds of contact, such as regular telephone calls, messaging, video chats, or sending cards or gifts.
The only family members that may apply for a contact order under The Family Law Act are a step-parent, sibling, grandparent, aunt, uncle, cousin, and a spouse or common-law partner of any of them.
A non-family member may only apply for a contact order if they receive the court’s permission (“leave of the court”) to make the application. If the non-family member is permitted to make the application, the court must be satisfied that there are exceptional circumstances that warrant making a contact order.
A person other than a parent (typically a grandparent or a step parent) is also permitted to apply for a contact order under the Divorce Act.
When parents can’t take care of their children, grandparents, other family members, or others with a special connection to a child, who step in to assume responsibility for the child’s care, may apply for a guardianship order under The Family Law Act. Please visit the Guardianship or Contact with Children section of this website for more information.
What is guardianship?
In Manitoba, guardianship is the legal term used when someone other than a parent assumes formal and legal responsibility for the care and control of a child. Sometimes, when parents are unable or unwilling to properly care for their children, a child and family services agency steps in and seeks an order of guardianship. For more information, visit the Protection of Children section of this website.
When someone other than an agency wants to apply, this is sometimes called an application for private guardianship; more information, please visit the Guardianship and Contact with Children section of this website.
How do I develop a parenting plan that is best for my child(ren)?
There is no one size fits all parenting arrangement that works for all children or all families. An arrangement that works well for your child today may no longer work for your child (or your family) in six months or a year.
Is a parenting plan always necessary?
Developing a parenting plan is recommended, regardless of the approach you use to negotiate and reorganize your parenting responsibilities.
Considering what is important to your children and yourselves as parents, and discussing those issues early on, provides more time for each of you to make and consider proposals. Creating a solid parenting plan will help you think about your children’s needs and how you will continue to parent them separately and together.
Negotiating a detailed parenting plan is strongly encouraged, especially if you are experiencing high levels of conflict as co-parents, or are worried that you are headed in that direction. Even for parents with few disagreements or communication challenges, a parenting plan could be something you fall back on during periods of higher stress.
A parenting plan is a requirement to proceed in the Manitoba court in cases where parents do not agree on parenting arrangements. Each parent must complete a parenting plan in these situations.
If you have a parenting arrangement where one parent does not have over night stays with your young child, when should our young child begin longer care periods, such as over night stays, with the other parent?
There is no one answer to this question. It depends on your child’s age, temperament, how you and your co-parent are getting along, and many other factors. Many experts think it is fine to start overnighters when children are babies, if parents handle them sensitively (e.g., similar eating and sleeping schedules between homes) and if the parent with less time with the child is very familiar with the child and their routines.
Most of all, if parents and children are connected with each other — that is, the parent wanting overnights has been involved in the child’s care and the child recognizes them and responds to their presence – then it is more likely that your child will benefit from overnight stays. Longer stays can be introduced slowly, with parents monitoring how their child is responding.
Often, the schedule will seem too long for one parent and too short or not soon enough for the other. Time spent together on a very regular basis (daily, if possible, or every second or third day depending on the age of the child), with some occasional overnights, may be considered. The less-seen parent and child can get to know each other better in the special ways that nighttime routines (e.g., eating, bathing, sleeping) provide. Ultimately, parenting time schedules should be based on the best interest of the child.
At what age should children be given a say?
Even very young children can say what they prefer on small matters (e.g., what toys to bring to their new home, what color to paint their new room). School-age children should be given a voice about which social or sports activities they prefer. Adolescents usually want to express their ideas on bigger matters (e.g., where to go to school and where to be on weekends). The court does consider the thoughts and wishes of a child, taking into account the child’s age and level of maturity, as well as other factors. While there is no specific age at which a child should be given a say, the more mature and older the child, the greater the consideration.
If you aren’t sure about how to give your children a voice, without your children saying what they think adults need to hear, you should ask for help from a mediator, child development specialist or a counselor.
At what point in the process should a child be asked for their input, and about what?
Some children will have strong opinions from the very start. Others will need to see what a new situation feels like before knowing how they feel about it. A mediator or child development specialist can be very helpful in these situations. It usually takes only a couple of meetings to get a professional opinion. Children also will give you clues about when they are ready to talk. Just follow their lead. Children should not be asked if there should be a separation or divorce, or with which parent they want to live. Putting a child in one of these positions is stressful. Other than this, children can be asked for their opinions on many topics. Younger children may be asked about simpler choices, whereas older children may be asked about more complex choices, such as the schedule of spending time with each parent.
When talking to children about their ideas, parents should remind and reassure children that final decisions are up to the parents.